Home Again

Well, here I be. I made it home in one piece, and my wonderful adventure comes to a close. My two weeks in Copenhagen were just as close to perfect as any trip could be.

In two weeks I saw a castle built in the 11^th Century or earlier and touched 1000 year old masonry, I went to Tivoli Gardens, saw the Copenhagen City Museum (Danish: Bymuseum), ate a lot of good food, met many of Annie’s family (and they were all wonderful), walked a lot, ate a danish pastry or two (Danish: wienerbrød), and even spoke a little bit of Danish. Exhausting but fun.

It was so wonderful to see Annie, and to meet Jens, Maria, Tony, Louise, and little Sofia (one of the cutest babies I’ve ever seen). They were all so good to me, and every one of them was interesting, fun, and wonderful.

I flew back on Scandinavian Airlines. I sat next to a statistician from Stockholm. He bought me beers and we had the nicest chat for hours. I slept a little bit too. Flying back from O’Hare to Dallas, I sat next to a lovely older lady who, for various reasons, reminded me so much of my beloved and delightful friend Mia…Who is very much on my mind right now.

You know what that means? I had TWO good seat mates in one day. I think that’s a world record, actually.

I was welcomed by my wonderful friends, the best co-workers a guy could ask for, and some of my favourite clients in the world…including one I had not seen in a long time.

Travelling is amazing. I want to see more of the world. But there’s no place like home.

Saturday, 16th October, 2009: Anni and Jens' Apartment

Well, I'm sorry I have not been chronicling my adventures more thoroughly. Mostly I've been having them, photographing them (hey kids! Check out my Flickr site at http://www.flickr.com/photos/11701835@N02/sets/72157622561738496/), and hanging around with my hosts.

It's been amazing. The city is gorgeous and old, with historical sites and sights on just about every corner (Danish: hver hjorne). Annie and Jens have been great hosts, taking excellent care of me and adjusting their lives to allow me into their home. I've been doing my very best to be a good houseguest.

Let me talk to you for a second about the food here. Holy cow. First off, Jens is a phenomenal cook. I mean, probably better than you are thinking. That good. He's been making some some delicious dinners, I'm not gonna be losing any weight on this trip.

Danish food is not that foreign to American sensibilities. These folks eat a lot of sandwiches, pasta, and other familiar fare.

A big exception is smørrebrød, a Danish favourite. Jens and Annie took me to a very fancy smørrebrød place Wednesday (Danish: onsdag). Smørrebrød is delicate gourmet ingredients laid out on a piece of bread. The chef's English was good, but her voice was soft, and my hearing is not so good...so Annie had to order for me. My favourite was roast beef with egg and bacon. I tried bites from Annie and Jens' lunches as well and it was all delicious.

I also had a French hotdog. A big long bun with a long hole in it. Squirt in some mayonnaise, slip a long hot weiner in there and you have a delicious treat. Why is everyone snickering?

The weather has been almost perfect every day. Bright shiny blue skies, cool to cold breezes. The sun goes down a bit early (it's 6.45 here and the sun is nearly gone) and it's pretty durn cold at night, but not unbelievably so.

We have seen some amazing stuff. I love those old historical things, and well, they got em here. As Eddie Izzard once said "I'm from Europe, where the history comes from." We have seen some castles and palaces, churches, and places of historical significance. It's a real playground for one who loves old stuff like this.

We also saw Tivoli Gardens, one of the biggest and most famous amusement parks in Europe. It was wonderful, but I didn't get to ride any rides, owing to long lines (plus, I didn't want Annie to get bored, she doesn't do the fast rides). We did buy some souvenirs and walk a lot. Maybe I'll get to sneak back out there before I fly back to Dallas, and ride some thrill rides.

Oh hey, I've managed to communicate in Danish (Danish: dansk...argh...that was a weird one) a bit. Seriously. A week in this country, and I'm actually to where I can read about 80% of what I see. Which is to say I can read 80% of 100% of the writing. Or 100% of 80%...no, not that latter. Not really. But I've actually gotten to where I can understand a bit of spoken Danish too. It's a very hard language, but I'm getting there. Annie and Jens had a few exchanges where I've understood almost the entire conversation. No, I'm not evesdropping, these were the ones in front of me!

I've also managed to communicate with some shopkeepers and the like. Today, Annie and I went for icecream (Danish: is), and I managed to tell the lady "I would like two flavours, caramel and chocolate turtle...which contains no shelled reptiles, it's a rich candy that is popular here). Annie complimented me, and she doesn't give out praise cheaply.

More from Copenhagen

Friday (October 9th), Afternoon, 2pm

Copenhagen is a glorious city! I went for a very long walk today.

I slept well, as you might imagine...some slight allergies, but nothing more that you might expect.

Annie woke me up and she and I got some 'alone time' to hang out while she got ready for work. It was really great to reconnect with her.

Annie left me a key. After a shower (Danish: brusebad), I decided I'd try my hand at grocery shopping. I wanted a toothbrush and some sodas, nothing too complex. Armed with a 200 kroner (around $40) note, I went into the grocery store.

I don't know how illiterates survive. I had a big challenge identifying some of the products as I browsed, and I can read some Danish! I bought some mixed fruit juice, some Cokes Zero (they have em! SCORE!), and the all-important toothbrush. I felt pretty good about myself until I went to pay.

My tab was 65 DKr--I gave the lady my banknote (Danish: pengeseddel), the coin thing tossed out some coins, then things got...different. She looked at me and asked a question. I panicked. 'Ummmm..Sorry? I don't understand...' She asked me how much money I'd gotten (in English)...then I didn't know! Help!! I don't know these crazy moon-man coins. She handed me a 100 DKr note (maybe with slight exasperation, or perhaps amusement, I couldn't tell which) and I was on my way. Okay, well, whatever the case, I got my damned toothbrush (Danish: tandbørste).

After a rest, I went for a long walk in the park (Danish: park). Annie and Jens live just across the street from one of Copenhagen's biggest parks--Fælled Park. I walked its entire perimeter, snapping pictures, wandering, people watching, and window shopping. I never had to answer any questions, so I did fine, despite sore legs.

I thought I'd go back to the store and get some beer, but first, back to the apartment for a rest. And I konked. Hard. I didn't wake up when Annie (who had loaned me her key) rang the doorbell. I figured it out in a moment, but not before she'd gone away. She went down the street to see if that's where I was. Oh well, we laughed about it afterward.

That evening, Annie and I hit the town while Jens went to his gf's place (did the word complicated (Danish: compliceret) occur recently? Okay, just making sure...). It was Culture Night, a night where everything stays open late and people hit the street to see shows, have fun, and hang out. Copenhagen was crowded, but it was worth it...

I told her that I should write the Dallas City Council and sugges this. But then I said "the postscript would be 'hahaha, just kidding'" Coz seriously, Dallas isn't too interested in things like culture. Seriously! Fort Worth maybe...strangely.

After seeing some amazing sights and eating an absolutely fantastic dinner (Danish: en lækker aftensmad), we wandered to a trendy little place for a couple of $15 cocktails. Yeah, seriously. But here's the thing...across the square was a 2-person band. Just wait...you can't even imagine.

Okay, there was a man playing an electric guitar...well, playing may not quite be accurate...commanding feedback from it at a volume guaranteed to make your molars fall out. Like kind of mediocre Hendrix....but wait...there's more. Okay, on stage with him was a woman playing something in the trumpet family. I am informed it is called a lur, and it's a bit of a national musical instrument around here, but to me it looked like something from Dr. Seuss. So skin-ripping feedback combines with deeeep moaning trumpet sounds. Is there a word like 'surreal' only more extreme?

Anyway, so far everything is cool over here on this side of the Atlantic!

About 6:45 local (DFW) time--1:45 in Copenhagen

The Canadair Regional Jet which is designated United Airlines filght 6087 charges like an angry bull and leaps into the clouds. Dallas, my home since birth, dissolves into pearly grey and is gone.

In a few hours, I will be in Chicago, where a larger airplane will carry me on to my ultimate goal.

Copenhagen, a gorgeous old jewel set high in Europe's crown--founded by hearty Nordics in the days of castles and longboats. The glorious European capitol promises to be a delight for a lover of history and folklore. The Northern Europeans have a certain rarified reputation for their exquisite taste in all things culinary--my guidebook, spare and economical with words, waxes almost obscene with descriptions of restaurants, cafés, and taverns--I don´t expect I will be losing any weight on this adventure, abundant exercise notwithstanding.

Suzi and I have several long-standing traditions. Among them is that before any long trip, we go to The Original Pancake House. This old Dallas original fills the belly with good, solid food, removing the need for snacks and allowing the sort of mental clarity that a filling meal can provide.

Thus sated, my best friend and sister figure went with me to the Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport. She offered me wisdom borne of multiple international jaunts and she encouraged me with happy words. Finally, she hugged me with her strong arms, and gave me a beautiful smile as I headed into the labyrinthine depths of the airport.

With an hour to burn, I read some news from a recentg issue of the week and also polished off the first sixth of a novel Leah leant me.

Novelist Laurell K. Hamilton is a favourite of my Chamorro paramour, and I was well aware that I might eventually get involved in this woman's writing. So, after Leah, her mom, and her best friend Jeff had copies of Encyclopedia of Beings, we started to talk about faeries.

It seems like almost every culture has myths and folklore about supernatural folk living in wild places. From tiny pixies like the abatwa of abatwa of the Zulu people to breathtaking giants like the Greek cyclopes, some were friendly, some evil, many tricky. Some, like the Japanese kitsune and the Scottish selkies, wore the forms of animals. Some like the redcaps of England were quite malicious, while others, like the Irish clurichauns, were pretty nice to have around. Fascinating stuff.

Wouldn't you just know it? The illustrious ms Hamilton has a serious of books about them. And so did the pretty girl from Guam descend upon me with a sack of seven books, and so did the mythology nerd take the bait. What can I say, I just can't refuse much to a pretty pair of deep brown eyes. Plus...fairies, ogers, sidhe, in the modern world. So cool. Of course, with the speed at which I read these should be a snap. I'll be through them no later than 2012!


ABOUT 11:50 pm (23.50) local time--5:50 Copenhagen time, somewhere near Flint, Michigan

The flight to Chicago went withough a hitch. I can seldom remember a more trouble-free trip. It took a bit of doing to get to the international terminal at O'hare, but I confess to having a secret weapon: the ancient mystical power of 'asking for directions'. I'm told that many men do not possess this magick.

A train ride and a long walk later and I was in line/queue for my flight. I had no time to eat, but they will be serving some food before I sleep.

So far my mood has been amazingly calm all day. I must now confess to a tiny panicky feeling as I was bording the plane.

I have a big confession: I put on a good, educated face, but I am far from cosmopolitan.

PAUSE HERE FOR A DELIGHTFUL DINNER
These Scandinavians feed you pretty well: roast pork, broccoli, bread, even a little piece of brie, 'wee Brie' brand. Why oh why have I never tought to call my 'fake wife' Wee Bree? Probably has something to do with my strong instinct for self-preservation, come to think of it.

So where was I? Oh yes. As Buddy, the hilariously flamboyant gay character on Kids in the Hall once said 'I may talk champagne, but I am strictly beer!' Honestly, if not for National Geographic magazine, the Discovery Channel, and thousands of hours spent studying a half dozen languages I'd never have the guts to try to converse in, I'd be as clueless as everyone who thinks I's so worldly-wise.

So I get on this big plane (an Airbus A340, in case you are keeping score) and everything is instantly different. People are dressed differently from what I am used to, they look different, and everyone is reading tabloids and magazines in Danish.

I got a little panicky at that point. I may not know much, but I definitely know when I'm out of my element.

The inflight announcements were in Danish (helpfully repeated in English afterwards). I've been studying Danish quite a bit for a year and a half. I could make out words. Just a few words.

As the dinner people came around, I warmed up a bit. Whenever I was served, I said mange tak, a fairly common Danish thank you--many thanks, pronounced, roughly, 'man-guh tack.' While my pronunciation is surely laughable, I guess it was charming enough, they didn't laugh anyway.

So, as the airbus sails over the cold, dark waters of the north Atlantic, I think I'll try to catch a nap.


TIME UNKNOWN--maybe 9 in the morning in Denmark, somewhere between Labrador and Greenland

Not resting well, its hot and not comfortable, I've dozed a bit.

I just keep on focusing on Annie, with laughing eyes like liquid sapphire and somehow the trip is all worth it.


About 10.30 Denmark time, somewhere between the British Isles and Iceland

Success! I managed to score some sleep---uncomfortable and sweaty but sleep is sleep. I dreamt I'd bought a necklace for Annie, that's all I remember (no, not pearls, why do you ask). A bit of coffee and I should be good. I think bringing sleepy-time medicine was the right thing to do.


BEDTIME--about 11pm (23.00) Thursday Evening

Arrived safe and sound. I've now met Jens, a delightful guy who reminds me just a bit of our friend Doug Zook. I've also met Asha, a good natured and silly little whippet. It's been a lovely evening with G & Ts, delicious pasta, and conversation.

Heading out to Denmark soon

I sometimes wonder if English has too many words…but some of the kind of obscure ones are fun. Take penultimate for example. Did we REALLY need a word for “next-to-last?” seriously, I love the word, coz it sounds so dang high falutin’, but I don’t think many people would notice it if that word disappeared.

So, I just slept in my bed for the penultimate time before I leave for Europe.

I’m excited about going to Denmark, but I’m also a bundle of nerves. It’s my second time out of the United States, my first time to continental Europe, and the first time I’ve ever gone to a country where English wasn’t the main language. Okay, I know that virtually everyone I meet there will speak English, but still…it’s not what they speak at home.

I had an idea to learn enough Danish to get by, and have studied, on and off, for over a year. While my vocabulary has built up a bit, as the Danes would say “Mit danske er ikke så godt.” (my Danish ain’t so hot). So I won’t be holding any conversations. I might, possibly, perhaps get up enough confidence to order a beer (risking sounding utterly ridiculous), but I think my amateur linguistics will largely stay “on the shelf” so to speak.

Being five thousand miles from home, and not knowing anyone, is a bit strange. I’ll be staying with my sweet friend Annie and her boyfriend Jens (very complicated..it does however offer the possibility of awkwardness of nearly sitcom-esque scale). Also her delightful daughter has agreed to show me around a bit, which will be neat. I know a few E2 people over there too, although not very well.

There is a lot to do there—it’s gonna be a lot of fun. I am looking forward to meeting Annie’s family, and seeing her adorable grandbaby, Sofia.

Digression: when you get to my age, it’s not “do you want kids?” it’s “do you have grandkids?” Seriously, my at-home girlfriend (told ya it was complicated) has eight…and she’s younger than me!

But where were we? Oh yes…things to do in Copenhagen! So, there’s all that historical stuff I seem to love so much. They have castles and stuff…and the coolest amusement park…the one that inspired a young Walt Disney to make Disneyland. Seriously. We’ll have lots to do.

And Carlsberg Brewery offers a tour. With samples. You know I’ll be there…So yeah, sounds like heaven to me.

So I’m getting everything packed up. I need to send my amazing older sister an email and thank her for the plane tickets (yes, I already did one time! But come on…how cool of a gift is that??? It deserves two emails…and a couple shouts-out on the blog…and like, all kinds of thanks…THANKS NINA!).

I picked up my passport from the safe deposit box a couple weeks ago, and I’m taking my green scarf my client Averiel knitted for me (if you ever need knitted/crocheted goods, I’ll hook you up with her), and all my wonderful sweatshirts which I seldom get to wear here in the land of the warm winters. I’ll be breaking out my Beloved Black Leather Jacket and brand-new walking shooz too.

As it comes closer and becomes less abstract, I’m getting pretty thrilled about getting to go to Denmark.

So I won’t be around for massaging (or messaging) or anything til the end of October. I’ll not have time to check my Vampire Wars (so look after Escobar de la Cabeza de Pollo for me, my fellow children of the night) or my Sudoku games either, but I’ll get back to all that when I get home. I’ll be around on Facebook a little bit, at least to post pics (I hope) and status updates. I’ll update my blog as often as I can (I was kind of proud of how I did it while I was in England…so that’s what I’ll be shooting for.

I’ll keep you updated!